“Mr. Kennedy, what’s a poet?”
I’m very glad you asked, Cindy, we’ve got a lot to talk about. See, that’s a rather complicated answer, and the answer starts very small, because, Cindy, a poet is someone who creates poetry. Do you know what poetry is, Cindy?
“No, Mr. Kennedy.”
The definition agreed upon by most experts is that poetry is an economy of language. Any collection of words that means a great deal beyond its surface level meaning. Poetry is created at Art Co. Inc. with a very specific recipe, and we hire specially trained masters of diction concentration, called poets.
“How do you make poetry? Can I make poetry?”
No, no Suzi, you can’t make poetry. It’s a very dangerous business. Every poem at Art Co. Inc. starts with a novel written by one of our unpaid interns. A poet uses this novel as the base of the poem, and like any good base, to be neutralized, it must be introduced to an acid. In most cases this is hydrochloric acid, but in some rare cases a novel proves too tough for hydrochloric acid to have effect. In these instances sulfuric acid is used. After the acid and literary base mix into a liquid that will not burn skin from flesh on contact, it is mixed with pure-grain alcohol. Then the mixture is boiled until all of the liquid evaporates, leaving only concentrated fiction and alcohol. This mixture is squeezed into specially made type-writer ribbons, and then given to more unpaid interns who are then asked to write summaries of their novels on the provided type-writers. Many interns do not survive this step, but the few that do return with poems that are, when edited, fit for human consumption. Though, it is extremely possible that at any stage of the process the poem or mixture might explode. This is why you may see poets engaging in excessive vice. While we here at Art Co. Inc. do not encourage risky behavior, it is a risky career, and it seems to attract a certain sort of person.
we are lonely.
bring food,
good company,
and novels fit for mixture with various acids.
you won’t regret the results,
probably.
seriously though,
wear loose, flame resistant clothing,
also, uh,
please let us know before hand if you are comfortable with flirting,
we don’t want to harass anyone,
last of our desires,
but we are lonely,
and it would be fun to flirt a little,
if that’s cool.
